friends.... just friends.. .

When Ollie started pre-k we would ask about his friends at school, he talked allot about Madison. One day picking the kids up, I made a comment to Madison's mom that we had big fans of Madison at our house. She laughed and said, "Oh, we have a big fan of Oliver at our house. The other night at dinner she told us she liked Oliver, and that she might start dating him." (Madison has tween aged sisters)
UGHHH.
So on the way to the zoo Ollie and Madison had to hold hands, and they had to sit next to each other. When we got to the zoo we met up with Madison's best friend, a little girl named Devon. Ollie was heart broken, Madison ran over and was talking to her friend who is in the afternoon class. Ollie sat down on the curb and hung his head. How could his best friend have another friend and still be friends with him. We talked, we moved on, and eventually Maddy made her way back to us and introduced Ollie and Devon. For the rest of the day, three little friends all held hands.

Now, you know, that pre-k little friendships are just that. Completely innocent. I was so irritated with the other moms. Making comments about "ooohhh you better watch them" and asking Madison "is he your boyfriend?" I thought it was so rude. Just let them be kids, let them enjoy whatever friendships they chose to make, let them be innocent.

Blahhh.

to whom it may concern. ..

I am so bored.

This office air makes me feel like I can't breath.
sitting in a chair all day makes me uncomfortable and achy.
We as a society were not meant to sit at a desk all day tied to our computers.
I have a skylight above me. that is my only tie to the outside world. and it is frosted.

Yesterday was a good day. Today is not such a good day.

sincerely,
working mama, stuck in a three wall cubicle.
starring at a computer.

for the experience... .

So on Monday I got the day off (yay) to head to the zoo with Ollie's preschool class. Part of the experience was riding the city bus, and catching the 2 Max trains to the zoo. It was tiring herding 15 pre-schoolers and their adults on and off a bus, on and off one Max train, onto a second Max train to finally end up at the zoo. But that was the fun of it, the experience, right?. There were a couple of the *cool moms* who drove their kids, I think they missed out.

At the end of the day we were treated to a sidewalk jam session by a paint bucket drumming street performer.

Super Fun! No public transportation experience would be complete without the downtown PDX flavah...

* two mom's made a passing comment to me and another mom, "meet you there, suckers" I was kind of offended. Sorry if they are way to cool to ride the bus. But our kids thought it was awesome!

.. .dumb moms. ..

Magnolia...

We have the most beautiful Magnolia tree in our backyard. I love Magnolia trees and we always made a point of heading to the Sellwood park to admire all the huge Magnolia trees that bloom for such a short period of time in early spring.

But now we have our very own to admire through the entire, gorgeous, short little blooming season. Might have to plan a magnolia BBQ celebration before the blooms are gone.

don't you love how the little men's personalities show through their photos... Max the spastic, and Ollie the (semi) sweet bean.

1.5 days down. ..

1.5 days down and 363 left to go... ..

It is weird being back in the office.

I have that strange feeling, like everyone is playing dress up and pretending that everything is soooo important.

The important stuff is happening outside the three walls of my cubicle. ..

How am I going to make it 363 more days?

Ugh.

Unrealistic Fears...

Like.......

My kids are going to forget who I am.

The house is going to self-combust.

I am going to miss out on everything.

My brain is going to be sucked out of my head by a computer screen.

The kids and B are going to starve to death because I won't be home to cook, or grocery shop.

I am heading back to the office next week. I am kind of happy. and kind of not.

pre-school...let down... melt down...

Is it spring yet?

Our standard two weeks of teaser sun is out.

I love these couple weeks in February when the trees start blooming and everything is thawing and drying out from our wet weather. I know it is just a teaser, but find myself wearing flip flops and heading out to the park, soaking up as much sun as I possibly can. Yesterday we were at the local park, and seriously there was about a dozen mamas and papas out with their kids. All soaking up the sun, it is like a mass exodus takes place in these two weeks.

It will end, the rain and cold will come back, I am not letting it trick me.

Ollie started pre-school on Wednesday. That was a hard day. I don't know what I expected exactly from pre-school, but the first day did not live up to my idea of Ollie's first school. Last year when we were toying with the idea of enrolling him, we visited a school in battleground. The teacher was awesome, she was a farmer and brought a pet pot bellied pig to school named petunia. The teacher was really Joyful, you could tell she loved her job, she was quiet with the kids, every kid that was around her, it was like she had a secret she was sharing with just them. The kids kind of glowed around her. There was a reason she had been a pre-school teacher for 20+ years, she truly loved it, and you could tell.

I know I can't expect every pre-school to be soooo awesome, but I guess when you start with that expectation, everything will be kind of a let down.


Ollie is attending the pre-school at the local community center. I like the teacher, and I think she will grow on me. She just doesn't have the same way with the kids that the other teacher had.

The first day I took him in, I stayed for about an hour and than took Max to play at the indoor playpark. I went back to check on Ollie, they were getting ready for snack, he got confused because he washed his hands, than decided he needed to potty, than was told to wash his hands again. He got confused, and got kind of upset, this is where I walked in. Than they had to line up for snack, my heart melted as I watched my little man being herded around, head dropped, and big tears started forming in his eyes when he saw me. I wanted to scoop him up, and take him away. I guess he had a meltdown before the bathroom incident because he was making a play dough T-rex and he wasn't finished when it was time to put the play dough away. He always gets to finish a project at home, and he didn't understand why they would put it away before he was done. I know these are things he has to learn. The teacher also had no assistant on Ollie's first day, so it was her against 14 wormy, squirmy 4 and 5 year olds, with most of the class being boys, that could explain some of it....

But it just broke my heart to watch the conformity! you know like they were all little robots, standing in line, being herded from one activity to the next. It just kind of broke me. I guess I was never really one to conform.

His second day on friday was much better. He is starting to get the swing of things, and so am I. I signed up to help in his class next week, and twice next month. Ollie has made friends, and gets really excited about going to school. So we will roll with it. I know this will be a great foundation so we don't have to go through this in kindergarten.... ohhh kindergarten.. We are looking into some charter schools here in Portland to start him in next year. They are based on Waldorf, or Emilia Reggio philosophies, but are funded by public funds, so they are free like regular public school, but a different style of learning. I am more drawn to these schools, but if we don't get in (they fill slots by a lottery system) than I am okay with that, and public school will be just fine.

No matter where the boys end up going, B and I know that parents play the biggest role in the shaping and education of their kids. I know we are going to be involved and supportive no matter what direction we end up going.